Seneca wrote a whole book on anger because he knew how fast it moves. The first flash, the heat in the chest, isn't a choice, it just arrives. But what you do next is. In the small gap between the spark and the action, you are free. The pause doesn't mean you swallow the feeling or pretend you're fine. It means you don't let the feeling drive. A breath, a slow count, a walk to the next room, any of these widens the gap. Most things we regret were done inside that first hot second. You can learn to wait it out.

Inspired by the old idea of response not reaction. Written by Ugo Charles.